Find Joy in Every Moment

Life can be one distraction after another, especially in this season of young children in my house. There is always something to clean, something to do, and a kid who needs or wants something. And when you are busy, it can be hard to remember to stop and take in the little things that bring you joy. Yesterday was my birthday and while it wasn't a huge party, there was a lot of joy.

My son waking me at 6:10AM singing me Happy Birthday and then snuggling in my bed.
My daughter soon following with her own sweet voice and making me a sandwich in bed.

Friends getting up extra early on a Saturday morning to take me for a birthday breakfast.

My sister with a phonecall to sing me Happy Birthday.

Tons of text messages and FB posts of birthday wishes.

A "you're more like a daughter than a daughter-in-law" card from my in-laws.

Flowers and a sweet card (read to me by my 7 year old) from my husband.

Video games with my sons.

Cookie making with my daughter.

A family movie and snuggling on the couch.

Dinner from my favorite Thai restaurant.

A handmade birthday hat to wear at dinner.

A "grand" singing of Happy Birthday by a dear friend. My heart smiles.


The older you get, the less you need the big blowout party. But there is still Joy in the small, sweet moments with family and friends. And I won't stop looking for mine.

How to Live Minimally Where You Are

I dream of living in a tiny house. Downsizing sounds amazing. Even better would be the ability to own a home outright. I have read all the blogs, looked at tiny house schematics, and created my own tiny house vision. But alas, for now, it is all just a dream.....

I live with my husband and two children in a large home (large is a relative term I suppose, but it is large to me) in the suburbs. I love the area we live in. We are surrounded by friends, our church, and a great community. There is a variety of restaurants and activities to do within a short drive. I love my kids' school and the house is our only debt.

Over the past 3 years, I have been on a journey. A journey to minimize my life. To rid myself of things that don't serve me. To find out the things that do. I cannot put a number on the things I have gotten rid of but there is plenty still here. But the things that remain are things that either add value to my life or to my family's life.

Recently, I have been thinking and thinking of how I can live "tiny" but stay exactly where I am. I think in some respects, I am doing it right now. The main areas of my life that have been affected are my closet, my living spaces, cleaning, available time, and my personal life.

I began my journey attempting to create a reading room, a place of retreat for me. When that began, I would have never guessed that I would desire to downsize and live tiny. I just wanted a space clear of clutter where I could read in peace and quiet. (ha ha  I have 2 children. There is no such thing.)

So the journey began in one room of our house. In that room, I got rid of a couch, a huge bookshelf, a desk, a chair, all of my books (save a literal handful), and more. I went through papers we saved from financial institutions, etc.  I purged and shredded happily. Everything we need is online anyway. Tax returns were the only papers that were saved, untouched.

After that room, I became inspired and began reading blogs on minimalism, simplicity, and intentional living. I stumbled across bemorewithless.com and Courtney Carver's capsule wardrobe challenge. Immediately, I wanted to do that. I culled my clothes down to very few but well loved pieces. And my closet is now open and light with no excess.

I think I may gotten really excited at this point and possibly a little obnoxious to some friends of mine. Sorry. I moved on from there to EVERY ROOM OF THE HOUSE. I began to purge and get rid of things with abandon. But while there are 4 people in this house, I mainly kept the purging to my own stuff or household stuff. I did purge some clothes and baby toys that my kids had grown out of but in large part, my goal was to do this for myself.

My husband finally took notice to my closet purge and did his own! But my kids still cling to their toys and stuff like it's life or death. Occasionally, I will ask them about certain toys or stuffies and whether we should donate them to a child who may not have toys. But I don't force it. I want to be an example for them. That less is more in life.

Beginning this New Year, my friends and I have been doing the 30 day minimalism game - https://www.theminimalists.com/game/ . It is Day 23 and I honestly have no more things to rid myself of. Since I've been on this journey for a little while longer than my friends, there is not much left to get rid of! Which makes me smile.

This journey has purged my closet and house of a ton of clutter and stuff, which makes cleaning so much easier and living spaces open and inviting. However, the greatest effect may be on my time and my personal life. I have more time to do other things now and I am working toward developing my passions. For now, I will focus on that until life opens the door for my tiny house dream to come true.

Word!

So I have read recently (and in years past) about other bloggers choosing a Word of the Year for their life. I always thought this was a ridiculous and interesting notion. How could a person choose just ONE word that would define their life for the entire year? It seemed absurd to me.

However, at the beginning of this year, I was reading one of my favorite blogs (www.handsfreemama.com) and she uses mantras like "only love today." Maybe she was onto something?

If you ask my friends what I want more than anything else, it is PEACE. Of course, I was looking for peace in my house, my life, and my circumstances.And life doesn't work that way. Life is chaos. Life is unstructured, unpredictable, and unruly. Which can make it feel exciting and adventurous at times. And stressful and grueling at others.

So what am I truly searching for? The answer I discovered right before the beginning of this new year is PEACE. Not peace on the outside though. Peace on the inside. Peace in my soul. Peace in my heart. Peace in my actions and reactions.

After a bit more thought, I chose a word of the year for myself. A word I want to focus on and intentionally make plans to obtain. That word is CALM.

I intend to chase after CALM in my life this year. Not in my surroundings. But within myself. To breathe when I feel chaos inside. To stop for a moment instead of immediately reacting to the outside world. To let go of my own preconceived notions of what peace is or what it should be. To just be. In the midst of my day, chaotic or not, to just be and have my heart and my mind be at peace.

At this point, it sounds unattainable. Impossible. But why should my insides match my outsides? Do I have to own chaos within myself if my environment is chaotic? Or can I remain calm? Can I have that peace that has eluded me for so long? And if I really believe that peace only comes when my circumstances are calm, peaceful, quiet; doesn't that make for a dismal existence?

So I will continue to search, chase, focus on, and run down this word CALM. I will repeat it in my mind when the world around me is in complete disorder. I will say out loud when my home is loud and kids are fighting. I will reach for it. I will obtain it.

To Yoga or Not to Yoga

One of my NY goals was to begin practicing yoga again. Last week, I registered and paid a group of classes and went to my first group yoga class in 10 years. Just writing that number makes me feel old. And it makes me wonder "what took me so long?" My previous experience with yoga was so amazing that I can't believe I ever stopped. But a big move, life changes, and having kids can change your priorities in huge ways.

Practicing yoga has so many health benefits. Physical, emotional, and mental health benefits. After just one practice, I noticed these 6 benefits:

1. The biggest benefit I noticed was SELF CARE. This occurred for me in just attending the class. Scheduling the time out of my day, making the appointment, and showing up for class. Like many moms, I spend 99% of my day thinking about and taking care of everyone else. I began putting myself last when I was pregnant with my first child. And recently, I have been attempting to regain some time and mental space for myself. 
2. ADULT TIME flowed out of the first benefit. Other than my husband and a couple of friends, I spend most of my days with my kids. Adult conversation is sometimes lacking in my life. And I will admit that a lot of days even the conversation with my husband and friends is about kids. It was wonderful to go to a new place and meet new people. The women in the class were so welcoming and no one asked me about my kids. 
3. BREATH - One of the most important parts of practicing yoga is finding your breath, slowing it down, and syncing it with your movements. For me, the benefit is even more basic. I finally had the space and permission to stop and take a breath. A real breath. Not the shallow ones I take when I'm rushing around trying to do everything all at the same time. In yoga, the instructor actually encourages you to breathe deeply, feel the air as you bring it in to your body, feel it fill up your lungs, lift your diaphragm, and then gently exhale, feeling it leave your body, hopefully taking with it some of the constant negativity in this world.
4. Closely related to breath is one of my favorite benefits: MEDITATION. I have tried meditation before and honestly, I am terrible at it. I can never sit still long enough or quiet my mind. Thoughts of all I "should" be doing race through my mind. But with yoga, I am so focused on my breath and the movements that my mind becomes calm and quieter. By the end of practice, I leave wishing there was more time to "just be."
5. One of the biggest physical benefits for me is more FLEXIBILITY. I'm a runner and my hips stay pretty tight so yoga is a great way of balancing me out. I need to gain back that flexibility and limber those muscles to prevent injury. 
6. One benefit that always surprises me when I practice yoga is STRENGTH TRAINING. You use so many more muscles than you would think. I spent a good deal of time during practice trying to balance myself into a pose, with shaking muscles. The day after practice I awoke sore and feeling muscles that I never feel when I run. Yoga is a great combination of relaxation and strength training that you may not find in other workouts.

I probably could keep going because I love yoga so much. There are other benefits that I remember from practicing years ago: better balance and coordination, better posture, and so on. I cannot wait to experience these again. 

If you have never tried yoga, I would encourage you to try a class or two. I promise you that will experience more benefits to your health than you ever imagined! 

Namaste

Just Do It!

Nike has it right. If you really want to do something, thinking about it, planning for it, talking to people about it, or even researching it will never ever get you closer to actually DOING IT. You have to choose a moment and JUST DO IT!

So here I am. Just doing it. What's IT? Writing.

I started this year with a promise to myself to write more. Blog. Journal. Write a book. Just WRITE more.

So I think everyday about things I want to write about. I read blogs online from other people writing about what they love. Sometimes when I'm running, I will think of topics and even full paragraphs about what I want to write. And then I get home...and I don't write anything.

This morning I sit, sleepy-eyed, groggy, not fully awake yet and I want to write. But nothing comes to mind. Except "just do it." Just sit down, pull up a blank page, and put words on it.

I often joke with a friend: "What is the answer to - Should I run today?" My friend says "It's always YES."  That makes me think. What is the answer to the question - Should I write today? Or should I work on that project today? Or should start working toward my passion today? Maybe the answer to all those questions should be a resounding YES!

Yes, you should begin to take a little time out of your schedule to make room for those things that you love, that you've always wanted to do, that you say there is not enough time for, that you talk yourself out of, and on and on. There will always be a million reasons why you shouldn't do something. But maybe if you keep telling yourself - Yes! Just Do It! , then it will sink in. Enough for you to finally begin to do the thing you've always wanted to do.

What is the thing that you have always wanted to do? What is the thing that you think might be crazy? Or silly? Or a waste of time, but you love it anyway? Just do it. Say YES to yourself. Give yourself permission to take an hour from your weekly schedule of all the "must do's" and "have to's" and do that thing you love. That thing that makes you smile. That thing that brings you joy. Go ahead.

Just do it.

Cell Phones....Do we need one?

My son who is 9 tells me "cell phones are useless". Somehow this is his version of reverse psychology because he really wants a phone.  I think it is hilarious. Some of his friends have cell phones. Some of them do not. His father and I have been discussing when to get him a phone, mostly at this point, so he can text a best friend who just moved away :(

This week, I dropped my cell phone and the screen shattered. Now, if this were the only problem, I would get the screen replaced and move on. However, my phone already has issues: no audio when video recording, power button ceased functioning so I must use accessibility button, and a battery that my husband replaced himself.

Phone shopping here I come! UGH  Walking into our local cellular phone store for me is akin to trying on jeans after I've been swimming. Dreadful! Cell phone stores, car dealerships, and lending companies. These businesses always feel like I'm in a shark tank. Pushy. Aggressive. Forcing me to purchase something I don't really want for more money than I actually wanted to spend.

Yesterday, I went to "look". Gratefully, I said this to the manager when I walked in and he allowed me to look around unencumbered and without a sales rep! Relief! I didn't quite decide what phone I would purchase because

1. There are too many choices
2. They all have great features
3. Most phone have HUGE screens now
4. 95% are ridiculously expensive

As a minimalist, I am struggling with this decision. I believe I have come to a decision. In this world of technology, I must have a cell phone. I have small children and my cell phone serves as my home phone. It's point of contact for teachers, school, emergencies, doctors, house services, friends, and family.

As much as I desire to step away from the "smart" tech world, it is easier to keep the same technology that I am already familiar with. What is that saying? Better to stick with the devil you know. Fortunately, they have recently released a new phone that is more affordable in price.

It will be exciting to start over with a new phone. I will have a clean slate (in a way) to add to. I plan to be much more intentional about what apps I add and how much I use this phone. My desire is to return to a state me using my phone as a tool, and not my phone consuming so much of my time that it becomes more like addiction.

Release Netflix and other streaming apps. Release Word games. Release miscellaneous apps that I never use. Clean slate. And now let's begin.

Let's Talk Passion

I never thought about this word much... Passion. It reminded me of love stories and soap operas. But recently I've been searching for my passion. In life. Something that stirs me to action. Something that puts a fire in my soul. What's your passion?

I don't believe that you have just ONE. I think you have many. It's probably best to only focus on one or two at a time. I have several passions. So many things that I would love to pursue. To chase down, until I knew all there was to know. To learn all about it. To act upon it. To create something from it.

Here's a brief glimpse (and I don't think these are all):

• God
• Encouraging women in God
• Prayer
• Dinosaurs
• Minimalism
• Organizing/Purging
• Helping Others
• Astronomy
• Archaeology 
• Running
• Whole Foods Eating
• Writing
• Music
• Singing

I could keep going. On and on, they would spill out. Sometimes like a broken faucet that won't stop flowing. What to do with all these passions? I give them occasional notice, but for the most part, they just stay in my heart and my mind, quiet.

In the New Year, I promised to give time to a few of them. Writing. I'm still thinking on what this will look like. Will I write that book? Will I journal? Will I blog? All this that I have to say. Who will even listen? Maybe no one. Maybe that's not the point. To write. Just to write it down. That could be enough. Just enough. To feed this passion. 

How will you feed one of your passions this year? A New Year is ripe with possibilities and openness and the feeling that anything can happen. And it can. What will you do?

New Year New Me?

I think the title should be more like New Year, Better Me? or New Year, Still a Work in Progress Me?  (ha)

One of my goals for 2018 is to write MORE. Striving for three times per week. Either on this blog or in a journal. So here's my first of many posts!

My New Year 2018 Goals:

I made a list of my priorities and developed goals for each. So they are specific and very important to me.

• God 
• I want to spend more time with God - reading, praying, worshiping. 
• I really want to focus on fruits of the spirit. Specifically, I would love more joy, peace, patience, self-control in my life.

• Health
• Run 30 miles each month (2017 goal met!)
• Speed work 1 x week
• Yoga 1 x week
• Strength training 1 x week
• More nature; get outside more

• Family
• Spend more time with family (and friends)
• Experiences over Stuff

• Passions
• Write 3 x week (blog, journal, book)
• Pursue training to be a life coach
• Simplify more

Any questions? You can leave comment and I'll reply :)  

Now Go write your goals! Here's to a fantastic 2018!!!